Im reaching out, don’t know what for
My tools won’t work, in need of more
My mindset shifts from dark to light
And Nightmares haunt me day and night
My safe routine is out of whack
My mood is wobbly, mostly black
Gratitude I try apply
When really I just want to cry
I know I’m blessed as I exist
Intrusive thoughts they don’t resist
Exhausted from this too and fro
My shadow rules my light and glow
My soothing systems lost its clout
My nervous systems screaming out
My senses tender, patience short
My conscious rattles in distort
I take deep breaths and ground my mind
The darkness slips in everytime
I hold the souls that heal my heart
Moments of extreme delight
And like a passing storm that came
My shadow takes its reign again
And while I see these divine gifts
Sent through universal shifts
All my dreams and wishes true
My shadow keeps me down and blue
I focus on the here and now
My triggers simply won’t allow
The kindness that I know I need
My past it dominates my creed
I’m loving life in recovery
But my shadow wants to smother me.
