I’ve been looking around at these familiar and known faces but I’m still alone. And I start to think, maybe I’ll be okay. Maybe I’ll survive another day. But i’m looking around and I know these people, but nobody knows me. It might be disheartening, it kind of is. Nobody really knows how much I’m struggling right now. Ive been through so much this new year and I keep pretending I’m okay.

I help everyone else with their bad days, I text and ask how they’ve been, but nobody texts me. No one asks if i’m okay. Or if they do I tell them I’m fine, and they’re not real friends if they don’t see im lying. I

I’m not fine. I’m being torn apart at the seams and I have nobody to turn to, except I know I should. I know I need to.

You would think all these “friends” would be here for me. But they’re only there when I’m there for them. I want to feel light again, not weighed down by depressing. I want to be happy. Or at least have moments of feeling happy. I don’t know. Maybe this doesn’t make sense… or maybe it makes complete sense?